“Gratitude is the attitude that sets the altitude for living.” – James MacDonald
With the holiday season approaching and Canada’s Thanksgiving right around the corner, let’s take a moment to talk about gratitude.
How often have you thought, or even heard yourself saying you’d like to be more content? More satisfied? More appreciative of the things you have or the accomplishments you’ve made?
The theme of gratitude came into focus for my wife and I first hand this past month. We took a trip, and one of the stops was Normandy, the D-Day site. The sounds of silence and the profoundness of what happened is beyond words. Yet, how often do we take the moment to gratefully recognize the price of freedom?
If we are not careful, we can easily move through life without giving thanks for all that we have. Instead, this seemingly small lie leads us astray:
“I will feel more content once I have _______.”
Fill in the blank with whatever you please – a better job, a new house, more accomplishments and accolades – but the truth of the matter is that being thankful requires one to practice giving thanks for the things they have now, big and small.
Let’s think about what it means to “give thanks” and how to practice gratitude on a regular basis.
The History of Thanksgiving
In the United States, Thanksgiving dates back to the 1630s, with the first one held in October of 1621 by Plymouth Colony pilgrims. This celebration celebrated the Massasoit tribe and the first harvest.
Canada’s first official annual Thanksgiving was celebrated on 6 November, 1879. Indigenous peoples in Canada have a history of celebrating the fall harvest that predates the arrival of European settlers. Sir Martin Frobisher and his crew are credited as the first Europeans to celebrate a Thanksgiving ceremony in North America in 1578.
These feasts were a way to celebrate community and provision. For colonists struggling to survive harsh seasons in the North American climate, the harvest was a way to express gratitude for their lives, their health, and the blessing to see another day.
Centuries later, we can still learn a thing or two from these early celebrations even though our lives are much more secure in contrast. Think about this for a second: How often do you stop to give thanks?
Three Ways Giving Thanks Can Change Our Perspectives
With the historic tradition of Thanksgiving in mind, I’d like to propose ways in which Thanksgiving can change how we “sweat the small stuff.”
1. Handling Stress
Gratitude can change the way you react in stressful situations.
Is it just me, or have you noticed that people do not seem to handle stress very well these days? Their behavior demonstrates things that, even just a few years ago, would never have been tolerated.
If you’ve ever been in an airport during the holiday season, you know that it is filled with delays, cancellations, and numerous other changes to people’s plans. Something I’ve witnessed is the way people treat workers at the check-in counter. People will scream, throw fits, and berate service workers for things completely outside of their control!
Living in the 21st century, we’ve become so used to getting exactly what we want, when we want, how we want it, that we no longer know how to handle disappointment or frustration.
What is the solution to this? An attitude of gratitude!
Being thankful for what we have allows us to take a deep breath, recenter our values, and treat people with respect in stressful situations. Whether you are dealing with travel delays, interacting with your boss and subordinates, or anything in between, gratitude can help you respond to situations instead of simply reacting out of fear.
2. Life Satisfaction
How satisfied are you with your life right now?
For a lot of people, this is a tricky question because satisfaction can be a challenge, especially in our current culture. We are constantly being shown stuff we “need” to have to be happy. Whether it’s a cushy job, a brand new car, or a gigantic house, social media makes it easier now than ever to compare our lives to others and feel envious.
Let’s say you just received a promotion into a managerial position at work. This is something you’ve been working towards for years, and all of your going-above-and-beyond has finally paid off. You’re excited!
Within a few months, though, you already feel dissatisfied. You have a whole new heap of responsibilities – plus, you just saw on LinkedIn last week that your primary school best friend just accepted a position as the VP of Sales in his company.
Isn’t this idea the very basis of all marketing? If you and I feel satisfied, we cannot be sold anything. If you and I are content, then there is little we want; even if something would be nice to have, we do not need it.
When you learn to practice thankfulness, you become less susceptible to the voices telling you need more to enjoy your life.
3. Redefining Success
Perhaps the most impactful effect of gratitude for business leaders is that it allows us to rethink our perception of success.
First and foremost, gratitude allows you to realign with your personal values. Most leaders know how it feels to get so wrapped up in the daily grind, that they forget why they do what they do. I know it’s happened to me before!
Once, in the car with my wife and kids, I asked them all to describe me in a nonphysical way. What was the first thing any of them said? You love your job. This moment made me realize that my most important priorities – my family – had fallen to the wayside.
When we stop to give thanks for all the things we are grateful for, we remember why we value and appreciate those things, and we can align our goals accordingly
Additionally, gratitude allows us to avoid stress and burnout through reminding us of what we have achieved instead of what we have not.
Part of the reason that so few of us can give thanks is that we no longer take time to see what we have achieved, to see what we have, to see who we have around us at the table… we only see what we have left to do.
When we focus all of our energy on what we haven’t done, we can easily become discouraged, frustrated, or even burnt out. Instead, focus on all you HAVE accomplished as you move towards your goals to remind you that you are capable of success!
Gratitude Does Not Excuse Complacency
In all of this, we must remember that there is a double-edged sword to being content.
It is possible to be content in something, but not content with it. This is the difference between complacency and growth: Complacency happens when we are content both IN and WITH.
Whether it is work, relationships, status, wealth, or anything else, the result is this: we begin to drift through our own lives without making any progress, change, or growth. Truthfully, I have never met anyone who drifted into the life they wanted!
Think about how young children engage with the world. They can enjoy the present moment without fixating on what they want later today, tomorrow, or even next week. They are content and satisfied, but they will soon want to try something new! This is not because there is something wrong with what “is”, but because there is something new to try tomorrow and grow into.
As adults, we lose this ability to both be content with our circumstances and eager to step into new things. This is the key to leveraging gratitude as leaders; we must learn to give thanks for today, while still viewing tomorrow as an opportunity for growth.
How often do we stop and give thanks?
This Thanksgiving season, I want to encourage you to stop for a moment and think about the concept of giving thanks. Gratitude should not be a once a year practice; rather, we should learn to give thanks on a daily basis.
What do you have to be thankful for? Gratitude can look different from person to person. However, no matter our circumstances, everyone has at least one thing they can say they are grateful for.
Endless piles of dishes and laundry to do? Be thankful, because it means you have clothes to wear and food to eat. Your job that you hate going to every day? Be thankful, because it pays your bills and keeps the lights on. Plus, you can always change jobs and find other employment. Even if it feels like everything in your life is going wrong, you can be thankful that you are alive, and tomorrow is another chance to try again.
Is it time for a course correction? The profound principle of thanks is one that not only we benefit from, but those we interact with as well.
A Practical Approach to Giving Thanks
I would love to see you transform your life and the lives of those around you through stopping and giving thanks. If you’re curious about how to integrate this practice into your life, here is a simple approach.
Take a piece of paper and on the left-hand side, write the numbers from 1 to 10. Then, beside each number write out one thing you are grateful for.
Most of us will get to about 7 and have to really think to get the remaining numbers. This forces us to take inventory of all of the things we have to be grateful for.
Next, try this approach with people at your dinner table or coffee shop. Yes, might be awkward – I know this first hand – but watch the change that starts to happen when we focus on what we are grateful for.
Now, extend this thinking to your workplace. You can do this practice in a meeting with your coworkers and employees. Yes, it can be very uncomfortable, but that is what real leadership is about. It is also what starts a culture of gratitude in your workplace. If you have any questions about this practice, or need more advice and encouragement on how to create a culture of thankfulness in your workplace, email or give me a call! Let’s have a conversation.
